Fake News
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[From the Archive] Confused Parent Doesn’t Understand What Child’s Permission Slip Even Says
Preface: This was written like seven years ago. Midwest City, OK – An area woman was left beleaguered and confused by a permission slip given to her daughter, who attends Carl Albert High School, this morning. Karen Caldwell, a shoelace eyelet diameter measurer in Midwest City, cursed aloud as her child, Samantha, presented her with Continue reading
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Baseball Replaced as America’s Pastime
Since 1858, baseball has dominated as “America’s Pastime.” It’s an activity that has been enjoyed by millions of people, both young and old, and is televised across the nation. Baseball, which was invented by New York House Representative George Santos, currently leagues 30 teams between six divisions, and each team plays 162 games a season. Continue reading
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Soft Drink Mayhem in Charleston
Charleston, SC – Tragedy struck earlier this week, on what most residents of the coastal town of Charleston thought was an ordinary night. What began as an innocent college mixer turned into a bloodbath and destruction spree for the ages as the Kool-Aid Man, a commercial icon made popular in the 80s, went what witness Continue reading
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Disney Reimagines the Aliens Versus Predator Series
With Disney’s acquisition of 21st Century Fox having been completed in March of 2019, many fans of popular movies in the Alien franchise have wondered what the future of their favorite xenomorphs holds. The most recent Alien movie to hit theaters was Covenant in 2017. It was the last movie to feature an actual alien Continue reading
About Me
Armed Forces Veteran. Writer. Father of five demon-child rescue animals. Milwaukee Brewers fan. Loather of the human condition.
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